Wednesday, January 19, 2011
One Woman's Experience Of Orgasm
The topics of conversation with some of my blogging friends have varied widely; from relationships to self-esteem and self-image, to searching for direction in life and generally just trying to make sense of it all. Occasionally, with those of you who are most comfortable, the subject of sexuality comes up along the way.
I'm fortunate to experience these moments as I've been learning a lot. Books are one thing but nothing compares to first-hand accounts, and it's nice to be trusted enough to have such personal things shared with me. I'm also very lucky to have a relationship in which my wife and I allow each other freedom to discuss these areas with others. I wouldn't have these conversations without Sandy's consent, and she's been amazing.
I'm posting one woman's account, in her own words, of how she experiences orgasm. This is taken from a conversation we had recently...
"What does it feel like to have a vaginal orgasm you ask? I have actually only experienced it twice. Both times with my ex. I didn't realize I was even cumming because there was so many other sensations going on all at once. I do remember that both times it occurred we had been going at it pretty rough. I kinda like it rough. What can I say? ;) He had came and was slowing down and as the sensation of him pounding me stopped I realized my body was still shaking and I felt my vaginal walls gripping him. He stopped and looked at me and came again.
"He was as surprised as me because I had never came with a guy before. I don't know what it is but I usually cannot cum with a guy inside of me (even if I'm touching myself or he's touching me during sex). If he's not in me I can masturbate and cum in a heartbeat but if he's inside of me for some reason I can't quite make it over the hump. I'm constantly right on the edge of cumming. When I was cumming with him though, I remember one minute just having my body shake uncontrollably but then I stiffened and stopped breathing and it just felt like my whole body was cumming. I don't know how to accurately describe it. It's as if energy was shooting out from all over my body simultaneously. Afterwards I just lay there in shock and giggling. Yes, I giggle with the last waves of pleasure as they leave my body.
"When it comes to a clitoral orgasm, it completely depends on whether I've been holding off masturbating for a while to build up the release or if I'm just unbelievably horny and need to get off immediately. If I've let it build up, when I start getting close it feels as if all the energy of my body is being pulled away from every other part. It's all being pulled into my stomach and my vagina. It's centred in my core. As I'm rubbing it starts to get more forceful and pronounced. My stomach muscles tighten, my back arches, I stop breathing and my ass cheeks tighten as well. Everything around me has disappeared and if there's a breeze around during that time, my body is so sensitive at this point the feel of the breeze along my tummy nearly makes me cum.
"When I start to cum, the first thing I notice is that my body gets even more tense than I thought possible at the same time the first spasm occurs. Since I've been building up to this moment for a few days, my vaginal walls clamp down so hard and holds there for a couple seconds before doing quick pulsating movements. My toes curl, my breathing is either still stopped or barely there, my body is shaking uncontrollably and I don't even know my own name. It's such a state of euphoria at that moment that nothing can break that. If there's anything else you'd like me to explain or something you'd like for me to elaborate on, please don't hesitate to ask.
"As to which I enjoy more, I don't feel it's fair for me to say which one I enjoy more because I've only experienced vaginal orgasm twice. I know I can get off through clitoral stimulation. Especially through masturbation. And no, I do not use toys. I have them but I don't like using them. I prefer a hot sweaty body under, over or beside me. I can't get into the right state of mind to enjoy using a toy. I keep thinking to myself that I know it's just me moving the vibrator or dildo in and out of myself. It doesn't turn me on. However, when used in conjunction with another person while they're kissing all on me, that's a whole different ball game. I'm guessing because I know it's not me actually doing the work. Am I the only woman who can't get off by using toys inside of me? I can use a vibrator on my clit but that too takes much longer than it would if I just used my hands as usual.
"As for what I think about, it ranges. The last time I masturbated I thought about my last webcam session with (my boyfriend). An hour later when I had to do it again, I thought about having another three-way. Sometimes I'll watch porn as well but it has to be porn where there's lots of moaning or screaming or grunting. I need the noise. That's what gets me off. The sounds. Come to think of it, maybe that's why masturbating with a toy doesn't work for me. I don't get to hear the sounds associated with sex. Balls slapping against me, the other person moaning, me moaning, my ass being slapped. Hmm, who knows. What's your take on this conundrum?
"No, I haven't had multiple orgasms. Yet. I'm usually much too sensitive after about the first 10 seconds so I have to stop touching myself and just ride out my orgasm. Maybe one day though it'll happen for me. I know you didn't ask this but I've also never had a G-Spot orgasm. I've come really close before through anal but he came just as I was getting to the brink. I'd really like to experience one."
If anyone cares to e-mail me or comment (anonymously of course), I'm curious to know how this compares to your experience.